hope

That phrase, “when it rains, it pours” is one of my least favorite phrases. I think because it’s true. At least in my world.

This week started with unwarranted confrontation, then releasing someone who was so beloved and someone who was… less beloved, then an emergency call from an 11-year old who’s dad is in jail and who battles depression. All in one terrible perfect storm of a week.

At 32 weeks, I’m exhausted physically from all the set-up of a normal week and emotionally from the cautious choosing of words and balance of mental toughness and outward tenderness. I keep praying that what I’ve said gets heard for what I mean and not necessarily the exact things I said because I’m never sure if what I said is exactly good enough.

And then I think about this new little life that will change and interrupt all of this. Another person who will need us – present emotionally and physically in all the ways it seems like so many other people do.

**note: I was working on this post and never finished it with life’s craziness and the unexpected time that Everly was born. I chose not to finish it later because the emotion and truth of what I was feeling then has changed dramatically now that Everly is here. I can’t imagine a more perfect little girl.

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